"Aren't You Afraid?!?"

I think the question I get asked the most about going to Rwanda is, "But aren't you afraid?!?" I typically launch into an explanation about Rwanda's past and issues still boiling up in the DRC and then finish off by saying that I am cautious while in Rwanda, but have never felt afraid. All of that is true.

That being said, I have been thinking about this question lately as I prepare to return to Rwanda in March with some of my colleagues. Now I think I would answer that question differently. My answer now will be, "Yes, I am afraid." And here is why:

I am afraid that no matter what I manage to do in this country, there are still children surviving on one meal a day--if they're lucky. I am afraid that people are still living without potable water and have to walk, sometimes 3 or more miles just to have a drink that won't make them sick. I am afraid that HIV/AIDS is still taking many lives and leaving people with large holes in their families where people once were--despite our best efforts at educating them, and despite the world's efforts at providing treatment to people in this country and many others. I am afraid that a woman I have come to love and admire for her dedication to the children of this country, so much so that she left America several years ago to make a home for them in their own land, will leave this world and there will be no one to take over her work with the children she has raised and loved as her own. I am afraid that once the term is up for their current president, another who will follow will not have the vision for his/her country that President Kigame does and that genocide may rear its ugly head once more. I am afraid that no matter what I am able to accomplish in my lifetime, these people that I have come to love will still be impoverished and forgotten by the rest of the world.

I was going to fill this blog with photos aimed at shocking by the simple horror that everyday life is for some people--mostly those with HIV/AIDS, but I chose instead to leave you with this one because it symbolizes the hope I have for the future of these people. It is what keeps me going even though my Mastercard balance is frightening and ways to make extra money in my own country are scarce right now......It is HOPE and it's why I will return as long as I'm able to do what I can so they will know they aren't forgotten--at least not by me.

(Thank you to Nicole Mainzer for sharing this photo of two of Mama Arlene's children on her facebook page.)